Russian husband and foreign wife
While many Russian women are obsessed with searching for overseas suitors, foreign women find Russian men as pressure they cannot find anywhere else in the world. This article is about relations of Russian men and foreign women. Such situation is rather untypical, but there are examples of happy families or successful relations between Russian man and Western woman.
Hanna is 26 and she is from Norway and Petr is Russian man at the age of 32 and they have common child. Hanna says that in her country many have children, but never get married and it is typical, so she does not bother about this. Peter hasn’t made her an offer yet, but she thinks the venture with the wedding seems romantic, so if he will make a proposal, she would agree. At the beginning of their relations lady from Norway thought she is kind of dating with the movie character of the 60’s. Romantic Russian man was singing her arias, asked to walk under the moon and made a lot of compliments. He opened the door, before she had to enter, gave her a hand and always helped to carry the bag. All those things Norwegian men would never do. At first Hanna was afraid that Petr does not treat her as an equal. And then she began to have fun as it is so nice when a man cares about you. Also she was surprised that Petr has always supported her point of view in any discussions. Norwegian would not defend the position of his wife just because she was his half! And the denial of feminism in Russia is just apparent to Hanna. In words Petr does not accept the ideas of feminism, but in fact has always supported his girlfriend’s career aspirations, is ready to move to another country if so requested by my work or study. By the way, dating with foreigners is not widely accepted in Norway. Hanna is surprised by the life flow in Russia and at first she never understood why her Russian boyfriend wished her “Good luck” leaving for work every morning, even if morning is so predictive to her every day. In Russia she realized what a fortune is: here you do not know what is waiting for you tomorrow – default or revolution. Every day can bring a meeting or event that will transform your life. Russians are passionate people with big visions and ambitions. Russian men cherish family. Hanna is happy her civil husband always put herself and their family to number one place.
Marta is 25 and she is from Warsaw, Poland and Vitalik is 25 and he’s from Russia, Moscow. Marta says she could not imagine that her husband would be Russian. She was studying in Warsaw to become translator of Russian and always wanted to understand Russia better from inside and for this reason went to Moscow for the internship. As an internship in Moscow was finished, Marta was going to come back to Poland, but a few days before the departure she has met Vitalik. They met each other at the nightclub. Vitalik did not even realize that Marta was a foreigner, but at first glance she understood he is the one and decided not let it go. Soon she flew to Warsaw, but they had a date at the “halfway” to each other in Kyiv, Ukraine. On the appointed day she arrived to Ukrainian capital, but immediately realized her cell is discharged, she doesn’t have charger and does not know anything in foreign city. Love story on this would have ended, if Marta did not pester passers-by to help her. Fortunately, that day they have found each other. But it was not the final test on their way. The next date was scheduled had to be in Moscow, and again Marta has got in trouble as her flight was canceled. She bought a bus ticket and was “traveling” to Moscow for two days. She arrived tired and dirty, but then saw joyful Vitalik, with a large bouquet of roses and fatigue vanished immediately. “Perhaps it is also the fact that I’m not used to getting the flowers as this is not common in Poland”, says Marta. Europeans build relationships differently, they have more selfishness and self-love. Everything they do, they do for themselves. Polish girls are very popular in Western Europe. Foreigners were wooing Marta as well, but she is tired of such relationship as there is too much freedom and each is living his separate life. Relations with the Poles somehow did not develop. In Marta’s opinion, they are a mama’s boys. “Also, we have so many topics of conversation with Vitalik! I like his romantic (probably a feature of all the local men – anywhere in the world will not meet so many convenience stalls with flowers, both in Moscow), determination, attitude towards family values”, says Marta. Marta and Vitalik are married for 2 years and have a daughter. She is very happy to have such husband as Vitalik.
Jane is 26 and she is from Sydney, Australia and Boris is 30 and he is from Omsk, Russia. Jane was 19, when they first met. They were both students and could chat until four in the morning about everything. She didn’t feel any language barrier and so she was surprised when a few years later Boris admitted that during those chats sometimes poorly understood spoken English. How difficult is to understand what other people say Jane felt only when she came to Russia and tried to communicate with Boris’es family. That time Jane noticed how Russian women differ from Australian. Most of all in Russian women she was surprised with nails. Long, invoices or accrued, with bright paint, rhinestones, patterns. In Australia, women try to look more natural, it is more important to them “to be yourself” rather than “to be nice”. In Moscow she had to get used to wearing a coat and heels. Fur is generally a separate issue, in Australia they do not approve wearing fur, indeed, it is not needed as there is no winter and most of the time people spend on the beach. Buying coat for Jane has become a significant event, and so not to shock the friends she chose the rabbit fur as rabbits are considered pests in Australia. According to Jane’s observations, comparing Russian men with Australian men, Russian obviously pay more attention to appearance. They use cosmetic products as creams or gels, aftershave, deodorants, perfumes and so on. Australians usually are limited to deodorant and occasionally hair gel only. But in general, Jane find it hard to compare as except for Boris she does not have had a serious relationship and he is her first love and for a lifetime. She appreciates his confidence, nobility and masculinity, that is something typically Russian, she thinks. For example, he never lets her pay for herself in the restaurant, while a man in Australia would only pay for the girl on the first date. However, trips to restaurants, as well as museums, theaters and cinemas in Australia are not as accepted as in Russia. Couples spend most of their time at home. As a rule, all live in their own homes, at a considerable distance from its neighbors. About the same house Jane and Boris dream of, too bad, in Moscow is not feasible. Sometimes they have a political debate. But they learned to smooth out all the conflicts and find compromises. As Jane understood the first ten years of relationship, just love is not enough for family happiness. It is important that the husband and wife were friends and she’s very happy that Boris is her best friend as well. “When we spend time together, we have fun, make people laugh with each other, I understand that this is absolutely my man, and it does not matter what nationality he belongs to”, says Jane.
Maria is 25 and she is from Cuba and Alexander is 26 and he is from Russia. Before meeting Alexander, Maria has never considered Russian man as husband. They even called her to fear and dislike. In Cuba, there are a lot of stereotypes about Russians, they say, they are all true alcoholics, criminals, are cold and rude in relations with people. It is not surprising that having got to work in Russia, Maria was afraid at first of all and did not hurry to get acquainted with the locals. In order not to feel alone in a completely unfamiliar country, she found a “corner of Cuba” in Moscow, Latin American cafe which was always full of Hispanic crowd. Maria got to teach salsa there and soon met Alex. He was interested in favorite dance of Maria. At first, they just have to communicate on their fingers, because Alex could not say a word in Spanish and she had the same success in Russian. They were communicating with text messages, translated into the online translator. After 2-3 months of such communication Alex began more or less understand and speak Spanish. They began to dance together and now Maria is in love with him. She adores his gentleness, friendliness and sincerity. Unlike Cubans, he does not hesitate to apologize if he was wrong. With him, she feels like a real woman, because it’s really important for him what Maria thinks of, what she wants and so on. Cubans also like always to be leaders, to give commands, to rule. And while Cuban women are talking to Cuban men in the same language, they can never come to an agreement. All Cuban women left to do is just do as husband said. Alas, a Cuban man will never agree with a woman, even if he really loves her. Of course, Maria’s relatives were shocked when they learned that she was going to marry Russian. Even Maria is still wondering some things: for example, in Cuba they eat soup and that’s it, and Russians eat soup first, then rice or buckwheat with a cutlet and then having tea with sweets. It is strange for Cubans to see that “With him, I become happy, self-confident woman”, says Maria.