Foreigners Arrange In Ukraine Bridesmaids “Hunt”
More and more Ukrainian women are looking for their soul mate abroad. Ukrainian men do not fall behind. In Soviet times, when there was an “Iron Curtain”, marriages with foreigners for Ukrainians were something fantastic. During the years of restructuring and life in misery, for example, in the 90th, marriage with a foreigner was for many Ukrainians the opportunity to “live better life”. But by the 2000s, the demand for foreign fiancé among Ukrainian women had somewhat fallen. Today, many Ukrainian women, like during the “perestroika”, are dreaming of marrying a foreigner and traveling abroad, writes website znaj.ua
One of the reasons is the complex economic and political situation in Ukraine. Some “enterprising” citizens even try to earn money on that. On the Internet there is a lot of ads like: “Help get married to a foreigner”, “Help find a foreign wife”.
In recent years, the number of Ukrainian women who want to marry foreigner and go to live abroad is growing rapidly. Most female enthusiasts choose far away countries where they prefer to look for potential companions on popular international dating sites. Some just go to rest in the chosen country and turn on the “search mode”. Not lagging behind in this plan also the male half of the population, who quickly understood the prospect of settling in a more prestigious and prosperous states.
In 2014, when ATO started in Ukraine, and Crimea was already annexed to the Russian Federation, from January 1 to July 1, 2014 – 982 marriages of Ukrainian women with foreign citizens were registered in Ukraine.
Ukrainians are often married to Italians, Germans, Americans, Poles, Belarusians and Russians. Couples meet each other in social networks, during trips and seasonal work abroad, through marriage agencies. According to statistics, one third of families are divorced for 5 years. Divorces are the most common among couples who were married for the sake of the benefit. Initiators of divorce are often women who relied not on relationships but on the money of a partner. Along the divorced there are many of those who married to obtain citizenship documents and legalize their stay in another country. Some are simply not able to get used to another culture, language and mentality.
Half of the women divorced abroad return to their homeland. The other half of Ukrainian women are successfully settling down overseas.
Young Ukrainian girl from Lviv, Ukraine, has married an American, who is more that 60 years old. They met in California, where she came for vocational work.
Girl says she does not care what other people are thinking about her in Ukraine. She feels happy with her husband. She was a waitress at a restaurant. Her present husband was a widower and has grown up children. Girl says they have big age difference in documents, but her husband is young in his heart. Before the marriage they were dating for a few months. For the first time American boyfriend checked the girl with money. He took her to expensive restaurants and shops, observed how she behaved, what she was ordering and stuff. When he realized that it was not about the money, he calmed down and stopped his “check”. Neither American’s relatives nor Ukrainian girl’s relatives knew about their relationship. To stay together they met in a neutral territory. Then American was tired of hiding and took his Ukrainian girlfriend to introduce her to his family. His mother believes Ukrainian girl is with him to get American citizenship, but girl says it is not true. Mom of Ukrainian girl was not against her daughter’s choice, but only asked whether they are planning to give birth to her grandchildren. Girl said they plan to have children, but after she finishes her studies (she’s going to be a lawyer).
Such stories are standard. But not everyone is so lucky. And if the girls manage to get married, get citizenship and give birth to a child, this does not give any guarantees that there will be no further unpleasant surprises.
The crisis in Ukraine, the lack of men who make certain decisive actions, some matriarchy have led Ukrainian women to take care of themselves, look for foreign husbands and those intermediaries who can offer them to find potential foreign fiancé. In addition, Ukrainian women have realized their beauty all over the world. They know they are intelligent, beautiful, well-groomed, athletic, active – this list could be prolonged to eternity.
“Safari on the bride” – with such expression in the UK and in the US they name so-called specific tours to Ukraine. The only purpose of such a tour is to meet Ukrainian girls who dream of a rich and happy life abroad. Lonely men pay special agencies for “romantic tours” to Ukraine and the selection of the bride. Tours are actively promoting on videos of Western dating sites. Agencies for money arrange a mass date for their clients. Usually the clients are elderly men. In the appointments about 30 foreign men choose wives out of 250 Ukrainian women.
What Westerners say about their women and think about Ukrainian women?
At home, our women are brought up to be independent. They live their own lives and do not care about their husbands, as the mother once cared for. I want an old-fashioned girl from a family where the father was the head of the family. She is accustomed to the fact that everything in the family is decided by a man. Because I want to be the captain of my ship. A woman needs to know her place, her duties, but not to pretend her being a queen, explained one of the marriage agency clients on the rights of anonymity.
But he forgot that modern Ukrainian women are not like he imagines as well. Progress, Internet, globalization, feminization – they have huge influence on modern Ukraine. There is no isolation to preserve women in Ukraine from globalization and young Ukrainian women would behave like their counterparts on West.
Girl from forgotten by God and people Ukrainian village
She is from the deaf village of the Volyn region, Ukraine. She lives in Kyiv for three years already and works as a manicurist. She rents one-room apartment in Kyiv and dreams of marrying a foreigner. She says that Ukrainian men for some reason love to lie on the couch and drink beer. Those who have money are not looking at provincial girls like her, but prefer to choose girls with money, rich parents and expensive cars. Girl resumes that to marry a wealthy Ukrainian is unrealistic task for her. She thinks the only option is a foreigner. She has repeatedly been at parties with foreigners, got acquainted with some people for a long time, but has not found her the only one yet. She says that not all foreigners who come to Ukraine have big money. She tells that French are greedy and the Germans are not particularly generous as well. She does not want to get married with the first better foreigner and to become a maid or servant in his house. One of her friends had relationships with an American which continued for about three months. He came to visit her twice a month. Everything seemed to be ok and seemed like marriage is close. Then he disappeared. The girl then worked as a nurse in the kindergarten, they are often under the medical examination and at the next medical check she was found AIDS. Here’s a “gift” from an American she has got.
Translator’s remark. [I am translating this article from Ukrainian into English. I am Ukrainian man, my wife is Polish woman, by the way. I would like to make a remark. I am very pissed about such “intentions” of that village girl from Ukraine. She’s got nothing to offer, except for her cu*t, but she’s choosing rich foreigner. She does not like French, German, making stereotypes on entire nations. I hope she would find the one she deserves – the same as her. To find descent guy you have to be on his level of consciousness, you have to be appropriate, unless you always will be a piece of meat. Why she does not think about her self-development, about some personal goals, and finding peace and harmony in herself she could attract successful men. If she would be like that she would attract this type of Ukrainian guys who sip beer on the couch, because as for me this is the type of guy she deserves for now (maybe forever). I did not want to be angry, but it seemed like here I couldn’t control my emotions]
Ukrainian widows are on trend
Experts say that according to statistics, every fifteenth Ukrainian woman aged 40-49 is a widow. The shortage of men has grown even more with the onset of ATO, so Ukrainian women are more likely to consider foreigners as future husbands.
The social survey conducted in September 2016 showed that 30% of Ukrainians would like to go abroad for permanent residence. I guess now in 2018 more that 60% would like to leave Ukraine for abroad forever. And the bride market is one of the easiest ways to achieve the desired one. A visa free policy with EU countries now simplifies this procedure.
During the last decades, the familiar image of the expat has already been slowed down, and in some cases the image of emigrants has been squeezed out. Ukrainian women (and men) travel massively abroad, to EU countries, to the USA, Asia, to the labor market, to the marriage market, in any way to provide their families, to create prospects and a basis for the success of their children.
Ukrainian women became the goods that foreign men buy – literally, or with certain promises and prospects, which assess how the price-quality ratio, while waiting for economic, social, status benefits-as of any other commodity like smart phone or costume.
Confession of Ukrainian woman on one of the forums
I’m not 20. I managed to enter marriage, I have a daughter. My husband died in 2014 in Luhansk. The apartment where we lived was destroyed. I went with my daughter to Mykolaiv to my relatives. We have lived there for almost two years. Through the Internet, I got acquainted with German man. We started to communicate. I told him about myself. After some time I went to visit him, he paid for everything. The return ticket was bought by him as well. For six months we have been living in a legal marriage. I can conclude that foreign men are better than Ukrainian. The Germans are much more romantic, they respect you as a person. And Ukrainian man thinks the world spins around him. Some of my friends condemn me. But this is my life. So it should be like that, I guess. I know many Ukrainian women living in Germany, because of this war they became widows.
Ukrainian man and foreign wife
There is a lot of talk about how foreign men marry Ukrainian women, and there is almost nothing about how foreign women marry Ukrainian men.
The image of Ukrainian husband was formed in foreign countries mainly by television. Many people think that Ukrainian men rarely wash, manage to drink beer in the morning, and even vodka, and then go to work. This opinion is not shared by foreign women who had to know Ukrainian husband personally, but not from the rumor. The Internet and social networks play an important role here.
Of course, Ukrainian men are much less likely to marry foreign women than Ukrainian women are likely to marry foreign men. Many stereotypes collapse after women chat with Ukrainian men. But here is one important factor. Ukrainian men love to have dinner on the table prepared by wife and so on, and foreign women are not generally suppressed by household things. It is important for most of Ukrainian men. Of course, there are also such men who are purposefully looking for a rich foreigner wife. As a rule, a single aged woman. Such ladies treat the younger constituent as wealth, and often such stories end up sad for women.
Of course, there are also love stories. After all, in foreign countries, a woman is more a partner for her husband, and in Ukrainian husbands foreign women find resistance, protection and may feel weak and helpless.
French woman about her Ukrainian husband
In 2010 I came to visit my girl friend in Kyiv. She introduced me to her brother. I liked him a lot and the week spent with him was bright and unforgettable. Returning home to Paris, I continued to communicate with him through the Internet. Such relations lasted for more than a year. Then we got married. We live in Kyiv, we have two children. I work. My husband is the best in the world for me! He will always repair the broken thing, gather the cabinet, replace the tires and pull out the car. The French are accustomed to turn to the special service. They can almost nothing with their hands. He is able to carry out spontaneous actions and is able to make me pleasure.
Ukrainian man who has married Spanish woman
I left Ukraine purposefully to stay in Spain. Accidentally I got acquainted with my future wife, after three months I made her a proposal. Her father has a large farm. Working hands are always needed there. In the family business I am an electrician, a carpenter, a driver and an employee. The father divided his farm into three, between his daughter (my wife) and her two brothers. Brothers do not want to engage in work on the farm. I generally noticed that here men are used to care too much for themselves; they love to be cool, travel, to do some high matters. But there is no one to work on the ground.
Ukrainian guy and Australian girl
10 years ago I went by student program to Australia. After the program ended I decided illegally to stay there. Almost immediately I started relationship with an Australian girl. I like foreign girls. They know their value if I may to say so, in relationships they are not capricious. This is a woman who is your friend, compared to Ukrainian women. Maybe you will not find borsch on the table, but they are able to act in such a way so that you yourself with pleasure will prepare them borsch.
Ukrainian man and woman from Poland
I met my wife on the wedding of my friend where she was one of the guests from the side of the bride. I am a choreographer. I do not speak any Polish and she does not speak Ukrainian, but we communicate great. Maybe because we are Slavs. She love to visit my place in Ukraine, but we live in Poland. She has a daughter and we are in very good relations with her.
I was divorced for 2 times in Ukraine and have 2 children. My wife was a widow when I met her. She is great woman and great friend. Besides, she is perfect housewife and often even invites my close friends for the dinner. When I had to come back to Ukraine for some period of time she was calling everyday and crying. I missed her very much as well. We really love each other.
The topic of international marriage is a large platform for scammers. Often foreigners fall into the net of love, and scams. At the same time, many – quite repeatedly. The scheme is simple: the foreigner registers on the site, chooses the girl, and after some time of correspondence the potential bride has some problems, for solving which she needs money – for medicals to a relative, on a trip to a foreign fiancée or simply dismissed from work, and the loan hangs as the bargain. If a man with serious intentions and managed already “fall in love” with the Ukrainian beauty, he sends money to help her.
Subsequently, it turns out that girl does not exist, and under a photo of a beautiful lady hides a scammer. But before the expiation, the costs of a trusty foreigner spent on faked Ukrainian bride can be more than one thousand dollars.
For truthfulness of schemes and a big “catch” some swindlers hire girls, teach them to communicate properly with foreigners. If a foreigner declares a desire to come to Ukraine for personal communication, it is paid higher.
Foreigners often can not prove that they were scammed, because it is always possible to say that the girl just did not like a man. A hundred percent guarantee is not fortunate even in the most decent marriage agencies.
Similarly, Ukrainian women suffer from foreign swagger-swindlers. Strangers create fake pages in social networks, appear to be rich, seeking a wife, and then lure money. Such grooms have already deceived many Ukrainian women. Schemes are prosaic – for example, the bridegroom sends a parcel with fake jewels. To get it, a woman must pay a percentage of a gift that does not really exist. Or the newcomer groom assures that he has got into trouble and urgently wants to borrow money from his Ukrainian girl.
Marriage experts assure that wealthy foreigners with serious intentions never get acquainted in social networks.
Partially translated from znaj.ua